On Sunday night, Mumbai’s crème de la crème gathered at the Grand Hyatt to celebrate the 10th anniversary of Vogue magazine, wherein the American publication launched the first edition of Vogue Women of the Year Awards (it’s male counterpart, GQ, has been hosting the Men of the Year awards for a while.)
Hosted by British actress Archie Panjabi (The Good Wife), it was a fairly well-attended do (at a venue that was impeccably designed) with top Bollywood talent such as Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, Sonam Kapoor, Radhika Apte, Kiran Rao, Shah Rukh Khan, Karan Johar, Rajkummar Rao hobnobbing with the likes of Mithali Raj, Karuna Nandy, Arundhati Bhattacharya and Russian supermodel-philanthropist Natalia Vodianova.
Among the many speeches by the several hyper-talented women who won awards in various categories, it was Twinkle Khanna’s 10-pointer speech that stood out, after she was handed the Opinion Maker of the Year award
She went up the stage and doled out 10 things she’s learnt in life so far:
1. It’s true that we get more comfortable in our skin as we get older but that is also because that poor thing is not as tight as it used to be.
2. We don’t need GST on our sanitary pads. What we need instead is an alarm inside it, not a wide breaking one as it would set us on a different path altogether, but an alarm none the less that warns us of imminent over flow and saves us from the 100 trips we make to the bathroom just to check. Now that’s a product I could not grudge the GST on.
3. Millions of Indian women fast for their husband’s long life on every Karva Chauth. My dear friend who just won an award does immortalize this in his movies (ref to Karan Johar) but I don’t think that our 3033 gods are really listening. Because when the mortality charts show up, there are 147 countries above us where their men outlive our good old Indian dudes. So ladies stop because It’s clearly not working.
4. It’s difficult to befriend your present if you are still quarrelling with your past.
5. God could not be everywhere so he created mothers and the devil could not be everywhere so he created mother-in-laws. Having said that I feel like I am going to be a terrible one.
6. The only thing free in life is bad and vice. Enough said.
7. Botox unfortunately does not make you look younger. It just makes you look like you are a part of a secret alien invasion desperately trying to fit in with the humans.
8. Our satellite only reached Mars because it was called mom. I am certain that if it was called dad it would still be circling the Earth, lost but not willing to ask for directions.
9. Life is but a chance in the game of choice.
10. For centuries women have been looking for a cape but have been given an apron and it’s only recently that we have learned how to swing our aprons around. So let it flutter down our backs and let it take to the skies.
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